So i been thinking alot about my life, and if i am living everyday to the fullest. I feel like one of the main reason's I felt it was time to make changes in my life because I was not satisfied in my friends, the parties, the boys, everything was just another day of the same thing. Life is so short, I am seeing friends pass away year after year, and I think everyday that could be me. We are never promised tomorrow. Death is a scary thing to think about. When I think about it, I ponder what people would say at my funeral or how would people remember me?
Would there be words unspoken and friendships that needed to be mended. I feel like I have been through a lot of hurtful stuff over the past few years. Still I find myself holding on seeking some kind of revenge from when someone did me wrong. I use to do that in middle school and high school, if a girl was flirting with my boyfriend well then I was going to flirt with hers! Oh, man glad I am done with junior high. Though what about the big things, the things that ache in our heart day after day. Things we don't want to let go cause for some reason we find the bitterness to be easier than the healing.
"Revenge is really saying to God I don't trust you to deal with this situation, this person wronged me and I can't turn it over to you, basically saying if I get revenge then I have control of the situation and determine what happens. Basically saying I think I can do my job better then you can"-Rob Bell
I think back to my relationship with my dad and how much anger I held on to growing up because he was not my ideal father. Eventually I got so tired of him, I literally gave up and just started to ignore he was even my father. If he wasn't going to say I love you to me, then I sure wasn't going to be the first one to tell him. That bitterness went on to relationships I had..I could never trust boys, and I was always looking for that boy to fill that place of my dad. I was holding these guys to an expectation they could not meet.
Finally after all these years I have truly forgiven my dad for not being there. Through that forgiveness, God has brought mending and healing to that relationship and my dad and I for the first time sat down and prayed together a couple weeks ago! WOW! We went from not talking to praying and it only took 20 years! haha
You know I think in the bible about that bible verse Matthew 18:22 "No, not just seven times, but forgive him seventy times seven times" I'm thinking you are out of your mind God. You want me after all this person has done to me to forgive them? There is no way I can do that; you don't know what they have done to me. Though...what if God said “I could never forgive them for what they have done?”
How many times have I wronged God? How many times have I literally said naaa I don’t need you today, or I don’t really want you today…I’m gunna do this on my own.take control of this situation. Not once has he not forgiven me or wanted revenge on me. Yayayaya, but what about those people who continue to be destructive in our lifes. How can we sit there and take them back time after time. I think of
Proverbs 26:11 As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly.
This verse defiantly speaks to me.. How many times are we in a bad relationship, friendship or something that is hurting us, and we keep returning to it OVER AND OVER AND OVER.. Because it is comfortable. Well you’re reading about a girl who did this for 6 years. Where do you draw the line between forgiveness and setting boundaries. I have learned you can forgive someone but God doesn't say you can't remember what happen to you and what you went through..
Though by holding all this bitterness it’s like you are chained down. Sometimes I feel like you have to let it go, set them free, to really forgive someone you have to wish them well and that good comes their way. With my dad I could keep being bitter or I could receive healing and begin to move on and break those chains that had been there for so long.
Everyone has wronged someone; everyone is going to let you down- even your mom and dad. You can't hold on to bitterness, and regrets forever- seeking for revenge and satisfaction knowing you got even. You’re never going to find that satisfaction. So set yourself free from those things your holding on to.. Let God take that baggage..
Because his way to live,I promise is the best possible way to live.
Would there be words unspoken and friendships that needed to be mended. I feel like I have been through a lot of hurtful stuff over the past few years. Still I find myself holding on seeking some kind of revenge from when someone did me wrong. I use to do that in middle school and high school, if a girl was flirting with my boyfriend well then I was going to flirt with hers! Oh, man glad I am done with junior high. Though what about the big things, the things that ache in our heart day after day. Things we don't want to let go cause for some reason we find the bitterness to be easier than the healing.
"Revenge is really saying to God I don't trust you to deal with this situation, this person wronged me and I can't turn it over to you, basically saying if I get revenge then I have control of the situation and determine what happens. Basically saying I think I can do my job better then you can"-Rob Bell
I think back to my relationship with my dad and how much anger I held on to growing up because he was not my ideal father. Eventually I got so tired of him, I literally gave up and just started to ignore he was even my father. If he wasn't going to say I love you to me, then I sure wasn't going to be the first one to tell him. That bitterness went on to relationships I had..I could never trust boys, and I was always looking for that boy to fill that place of my dad. I was holding these guys to an expectation they could not meet.
Finally after all these years I have truly forgiven my dad for not being there. Through that forgiveness, God has brought mending and healing to that relationship and my dad and I for the first time sat down and prayed together a couple weeks ago! WOW! We went from not talking to praying and it only took 20 years! haha
You know I think in the bible about that bible verse Matthew 18:22 "No, not just seven times, but forgive him seventy times seven times" I'm thinking you are out of your mind God. You want me after all this person has done to me to forgive them? There is no way I can do that; you don't know what they have done to me. Though...what if God said “I could never forgive them for what they have done?”
How many times have I wronged God? How many times have I literally said naaa I don’t need you today, or I don’t really want you today…I’m gunna do this on my own.take control of this situation. Not once has he not forgiven me or wanted revenge on me. Yayayaya, but what about those people who continue to be destructive in our lifes. How can we sit there and take them back time after time. I think of
Proverbs 26:11 As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly.
This verse defiantly speaks to me.. How many times are we in a bad relationship, friendship or something that is hurting us, and we keep returning to it OVER AND OVER AND OVER.. Because it is comfortable. Well you’re reading about a girl who did this for 6 years. Where do you draw the line between forgiveness and setting boundaries. I have learned you can forgive someone but God doesn't say you can't remember what happen to you and what you went through..
Though by holding all this bitterness it’s like you are chained down. Sometimes I feel like you have to let it go, set them free, to really forgive someone you have to wish them well and that good comes their way. With my dad I could keep being bitter or I could receive healing and begin to move on and break those chains that had been there for so long.
Everyone has wronged someone; everyone is going to let you down- even your mom and dad. You can't hold on to bitterness, and regrets forever- seeking for revenge and satisfaction knowing you got even. You’re never going to find that satisfaction. So set yourself free from those things your holding on to.. Let God take that baggage..
Because his way to live,I promise is the best possible way to live.
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